Friday, June 30, 2006

XM Radio


Or.....

What the hell am I supposed to do with over 200 channels?

As with everything else in my life I have a love/hate relationship with XM radio.

I've had it since the end of last year. I got it because I spend an insane amount of time in the car and got tired of not being able to stick with a show for any amount of time.

You see I am a talk radio junkie. What would happen is as I was traveling across the country I would find something on the radio, start listening and then just when it got good I would go out of range. No more show!

I know you're thinking, "But Vilmos don't you like music? Aren't you a musician too? I saw the drum sticks in your photo. Can't you listen to that on the radio?"

Yes I am a musician and I really love playing music but I can't stand listening to it for a long periods of time. It's one of the many contradictions in my life.

So I get XM radio, it has over 200 channels and I listen to.....

ONE.

I listen to channel 202 (High Voltage) and that channel has only 2 shows on it that repeat all day. They are Opie and Anthony that the channel was made for and Ron and Fez.. They are both comedy radio shows.

Ron and Fez are my favorite, I love those guys.

Here's why I like channel 202. It is completely uncensored and unedited. They can say ANYTHING they want. I like that because it makes for some great comedy.

So every other channel on XM radio can bite me.

They have a channel for every decade of music since the 40's. The only "decades" I would even remotely be interested in are the 70's and 80's. I listened to the 80's and it goes from Hall & Oats (geez), to Van Halen (that's good), to Culture club (Holy Shit!), to Donna Summer (I'm changing the channel).

Then you have 8 country channels. They are not by decade because apparently country music hasn't changed much?

Classic Country, 90's and Today Country, Progressive Country, Traditional Country, New Country Hits, Superstar Country hits.......

They threw in Bluegrass and Folk for the "rebels".

There is a channel called "The Heart" that plays love songs 24 hours a day. I wouldn't last an hour listening to that before I'd want to go out and kick some old lady in the knee just to balance myself out.

The only time I want to "listen" to love songs is if I'm trying to screw someone.

There is "Sur La Route" which is Pop Hits broadcast in French! "Sur La Route" must translate to "Do not Listen" because that is my plan.

Then we have "Hear Music" the voice of music at Starbucks. Is there someone out there that has sat in a Starbucks and thought to themselves "Gee this is great music, I would like to listen to is all the time!" Or is your coffee addiction so bad that you need to be listening to the music from your "house of worship" when you are not there?

All in all there are 73 music channels and I have no use for any of them.

So let's go on to the talk radio portion of XM, at least it's what I like to listen to.....

There are over 150 which includes my channel.

This includes C-Span radio. Now regular C-Span is like watching paint dry, why would I want to listen to paint dry.

All the big cable news networks have a channel that is just the audio of their shows on TV. Now I don't watch, why would I want to listen?

There is also a 24/7 Golf channel! Come on, can't these people get a life?

There are 3 comedy channels. I know "But Vilmos, it's comedy. That's what you do. Surely you must be interested in those channels."

Nope, I don't listen or watch comedy when I am not working. Aside from having heard most of it before, I really don't find many things funny. Hell I don't even think I'm funny most times. I have no idea why you do.

Besides, it's like listening to your job. I mean if you worked at the slaughter house all day would you go back when you were off to listen to the cows die?

I didn't think so.....

They have channels for all the major league baseball games (I don't care), NASCAR channel (I don't care) and 20 channels of Traffic/Weather for cities I never go to.

I did the math, I should be paying 6 cents a month......

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